If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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