Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
