I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
