At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
