he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
