My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
operation have a gay friend backfired
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
