I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
wow bdsm is so cute
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