I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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