I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Sext me about skeletons
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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