I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
