My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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