So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Use "feeling words"
Yay
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
