he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
