his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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