Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize