break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
