It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
