nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Randomize
