i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
if only i could text you this smell
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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