then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
