Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
