this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
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