she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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