Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize