Ambien. No doubt about it.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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