Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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