I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
