So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
