he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize