Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
