Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize