OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
