Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
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