only if we run a train.
done.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
not ubering you a puppy
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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