my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Randomize