Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize