I don't think brook has ever known best
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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