break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I feel like death gave me a hand job
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize