Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
