awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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