Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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