Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
