Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
