What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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