I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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