I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize