butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
They have beer where we have blood.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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