why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize