So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
