can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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