Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
