I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
