dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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